
From Left to Right: Helga Kegler, Aunt Mieze, Mother, Biene, Peter and my Sister Eka –
Waiting for a Sign of Life from Biene
A Unique Kind of Love – Part 2
In April of 1965, Biene’s parents gave her permission to see me one last time, before I emigrated to Canada. It surprised me at the time that they were so generous as to grant her several days to be with me. Later on it dawned on me that they were not counting on our relationship to last with such a long period of separation that lay ahead of us. So a little bit of generosity would help to sweeten for her the farewell, which they expected to be the beginning of the end of her relationship with me.

Old Mill at Watzenborn-Steinberg (Pohlheim) – 1965
Our rendezvous gave us the last opportunity to be close together at my mother’s place, to feel each other’s presence on our walks over the greening fields, and to hold hands while contemplating our future in blissful anticipation in front of the historic mill in Watzenborn-Steinberg. Experiencing the pleasures of an occasional kiss, given shyly, yet so passionately generated a deeply felt longing, which was to colour and penetrate the sentiments in our correspondence during our year-long separation. But for their ultimate fulfilment these tender feelings had to wait on the back burner of Father Time, while our fervently written letters brought us nearer to each other on a much higher plane than possible in any other way.
When problems suddenly and unexpectedly sprang up from parental opposition to our wedding plans, our love as if by divine order was tested to the very limits and almost to the point of despair. The crisis also brought to light the two different ways of handling a given problematic situation. Biene was always trying to see the other side, feeling empathy even for people who opposed her decisions, and showing flexibility and openness for alternate solutions and compromises. By contrast, guided by a mathematical mind set, I perceived in human relationships the need to connect two events in the shortest possible manner, deciding on a carefully planned course of action, and once perceived as the right path pursuing it tenaciously and yes, I admit, often stubbornly. While each way has its own peculiar strengths and weaknesses, containing a recipe for rocky and often turbulent times to come, the benefits far outweigh the negative aspects. As it turned out in the end the two opposite characteristics merged in a complementary fashion to pave the way to a successful marriage.
Interesting—sounds like my husband and me, though with the roles reversed, my husband being the more flexible one thinking of all sides, me tending to be more rigid and certain!
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Every week I’m thrilled by this moving love-story, dear Peter. It’s wonderful that you could have a successful marriage later on. Have a nice weekend, kind regards Mitza
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Thank you, Mitza! I am so happy to know that you like our story. I hear you have been thrown back to winter in your part of the world. Hopefully, spring will finally come and bring relief. Kind regards! Peter
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Yes, dear Peter, we have a very strong and very cold wind from Siberia right now. No sign of spring. I’m daydreaming about Kefalonia ;( have a nice weekend, too, kind regards Mitza
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Peter,
Your old pictures are very clear and colorful. I am wondering how did you get them to copy so well for your blog? Are you using Photoshop to enhance? The reason why I am asking is my father has scanned several hundred family pictures and none of them look as good as the originals.
Another wonderful update on your journey.
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There may be two reasons for the better quality of the images. I have been using an Epson scanner that produces excellent results. Also most of my images are coming from slides, which my scanner also handles very well. Perhaps you need to check the settings of your scanner and make sure the resolution is set to a high level of at least 720 dpi. Hope that helps.
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thanks!
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Da habt Ihr Euch ja gegenseitig ergänzt,Peter.
Manchmal ist es eben richtig, hart seine Ziele zu verfolgen, manchmal ist es aber auch wichtig, Kompromisse zu machen. Es kommt eben immer darauf an, welche Vorgehensweise die
annehmbarste ist. Ist es notwendig, mit harten Bandagen zu kämpfen oder kann eventuell nach einer Vorgehensweise gesucht werden, mit dem andere nicht so verletzt werden, daß kein Weg mehr zu einer Versöhnung besteht.
Ihr habt es trotz aller Widrigkeiten geschafft, zusammenzuhalten und Euch trotzdem nicht mit Bienes Familie zu überwerfen !👍 Alle Achtung!
Liebe Grüße aus dem tiefverschneiten Sottmar!!
Edda
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Vielen Dank für deine lieben Zeilen Edda! Eine weitere Einsicht in unsere Wesensunterschiede, die ich versäumt habe, im Blog zu erwähnen, ist, dass Biene ganz in der Gegenwart lebt und deswegen den Stürmen des Lebens mehr ausgesetzt ist als ich. Wenn die Dinge mal nicht so laufen, wie man es sich wünscht, kann ich mich trösten mit den schönen Dingen der Vergangenheit und in der Hoffnung leben, das es auch wieder besser wird.
Wir haben zwar immer noch Berge von Schnee, aber der Winter hat spürbar seinen Rückzug hier in Kanada angetreten. Viele liebe Grüße! Peter
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Love the photos!
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Thank you!
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The story is touching me a lot. And I love the picture too, Peter..
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I am so glad you like the story and that it even touches your heart, Nurul. I appreciate that very much, especially as I know how busy your are.
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I agree with all the other comments, Peter. I also really look forward to each new post. I told my wife about your blog and how much I’ve enjoyed both Biene’s and your writing. “Writing great letters is a lost art”, was her reply. I kind of think she’s right.
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If we bloggers go beyond the primitive likes and get involved with an intelligent discussion, then there is hope for a revival for letter writing, Des. Greeting from Canada!
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Sometimes opposites not only attract, but they balance each other in the most wonderful way!
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So true in so many personal encounters, and all the more so in a long-lasting relationship.
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Very well written.
“…was tested to the very limits”. You mean, exactly that contributed to the long-lasting success?!
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Yes, indeed. Gold tested in extreme heat produces the purest gold. So it was with the test of our love during these most difficult times. It had an enduring effect on our relationship as husband and wife.
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Love will always find a way! That seems to be the lesson here!
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So true! Thanks, Arv!
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👍😃
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Wonderful read, Peter!
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I am so happy to hear that you like our story, Tiny.
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Sweet that distance made your relationship stronger in the end.
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Indeed it did. Thank you for your kind words, Brenda!
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Sigh, but I love happy endings. Love conquered all. 🙂
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Perhaps the fact that each of you had somewhat different instincts when it came to dealing with problems meant that as a couple, a wider range of possible solutions suggested themselves to you. Certainly, you must have been doing something right to have had such a long and happy marriage.
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You expressed your perception of our differences very well. While they were often cause of disagreement, they were very useful in tackling many problematic situations.
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