The Peter and Gertrud Klopp Family Project

Reflections on Life, Family and Community

Chapter 40 of the Peter and Gertrud Klopp Story – Part IV

36
calgary-zoo-L-15

Calgary Zoo – Photo Credit: travelalberta.com

Peter Contemplates a Second Opinion

March 15, 1966 Calgary

My dear Biene,

How I hate this tedious letter writing! What is being revealed in our lines is but a fraction of who we really are. And the long wait makes our hearts heavy and sad.

There are two new developments which I would like to quickly share with you. My kind professor of German literature spent two hours to discuss our problems with me in his office. For the beginning of our married life Dr. Cardinal advised against my idealistic plan of getting by without any form of birth control. He acknowledges the same danger I described to you, the danger of a shallow life style, followed later by  a complete disinterest in raising a family. Yet, according to him, this problem is more characteristic of the common person of vulgar disposition totally immersed in the pursuit of pleasure.

My professor believes that you and I have sufficient moral backbone to return to our ideals, when we will have acquired a solid financial base for raising a family. We should not shy away from taking advantage of what modern medical science can offer us. On such a complex and difficult issue I think I will have to sleep on it for a while.

Dr, Cardinal expressed his envy in a good-natured way for our happiness. He said that he regrets that he married so late and had listened to his mother. Her opinion was that at the age of 23 he was still too immature to get married.

He also believes that it is sometimes necessary to foster illusions with your parents to alleviate the pain of the final farewell. In that sense he is partly in agreement with you and even justifies your actions. As you can see, Dr. Cardinal has been like a father to me. He asked me to pass on his kindest regards and he is looking forward to meeting you.

Now quickly to the second news item: I have been very busy looking for a small apartment for us. I found out that the Italian family upstairs will be moving out soon. I had a good look at the apartment and immediately fell in love with it. Mind you, it has not been painted for years, but I saw the potential of what we could do with it. The rent is only $55. It is like a large doll house, but large enough for two people. There is also a basement suite available in the neighbourhood, which I will have to check out in the next couple of days. As you can see, I have been busy in the search of a more pleasant living space for the two of us. If only the dumb thoughts and worries about our future would leave me alone!

Always in love with you! Your Peter

36 thoughts on “Chapter 40 of the Peter and Gertrud Klopp Story – Part IV

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Liebe Mitza,
      Gewiss, Biene hatte andere Sorgen. Die Situation mit ihren Eltern spitzte sich weiter zu und so war es für sie nicht leicht, sich mit diesen Fragen zu beschäftigen, wo sie zu Hause so viele Belastungen erdulden musste. Doch mein langer Brief war jedoch meine Antwort auf einen ihrer Briefe, in welchem sie dieses Thema angeschnitten hatte. Sonst hätte ich es wohl nicht gewagt, überhaupt darüber zu schreiben. Liebe Grüße aus dem Land, das sich immer noch nach Regen und Abkühlung sehnt!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. taphian

        Sicher ist es für mich schwer zu verstehen, weil ich einer etwas anderen Generation angehöre und als Frau für mich selbst bestimmen möchte. Ihr mußtet Euch ja irgendwie einigen.
        Wir hatten dieses Jahr auch viel zu wenig Regen, aber es war ein herrlicher Sommer, ich fahre fast den ganzen Tag Rad:)

        Liked by 1 person

  1. Pure Glory

    Peter, it is so good that you could take action. Having your professor to advise you was good. The apartment hunting shows that time was getting shorter for your seeing Biene. It is amazing what happens with the passing of time. Looking forward to her response.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Amy

    Very interesting that your professor was so willing to help you with such personal matters. I think he gave you good advice (you already know my views on the Pill). I hope that this is not too personal, but can you explain your idealistic goals and what you meant by the “danger of a shallow lifestyle?”

    I think I had some idealized notions of marriage when we were married 42 years ago—that our love could conquer anything, that we would be able to read each other’s minds and anticipate and satisfy each other’s needs, that we would never fight, etc. Life has taught me otherwise, but I still know we made the right choice 42 years ago. We are still each other’s best friends and still very much in love. But perhaps our goals were more earthbound than yours—it sounds like you had some very intellectual ideal of marriage that went beyond being friends, lovers, companions, and partners in life.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Dear Amy,
      it is extremely difficult for me to retrace my thoughts and feelings I had fifty years ago. All I can say is that they most likely had a connection to the literature courses that filled my mind with new and highly idealistic ideas. Perhaps I was trying to say when alluding to a shallow lifestyle that sex, while it is an important component in a marriage, should not be the only thing in a loving relationship. Biene and my ideals agree with yours that in marriage we strive to be friends, lovers, companions and partners in life.
      It is now time to see what new twists and turns are coming up in Biene’s response to my intellectual meanderings!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Amy

        I am glad we have the same idea of marriage, and, of course, sex can never be the only or even the most important thing in a marriage. Thanks for sharing—I understand better now what you were thinking. You were certainly a very thoughtful young man. No wonder Biene was in love with you!

        Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      The rent seems cheap by today’s market prices. But if you consider the rate of inflation over the past fifty years, the rent would have been at least $500 in today’s money. Thank you for your thoughtful comment, Luda!

      Liked by 1 person

  3. www.corneliaweber-photography.com

    Dear Peter, I have read this and your last post your suggestions to Biene about birth control options. I think it’s pretty brave of you to open up so honestly towards Biene, yet I wonder why you have brought up this subject a few times, were you don’t even know for sure that Biene is coming to your arms for the future. If I would be Biene , I would be taken back quite a bit , were she is in the process of taking her serious decision to move over , probably not even thinking of building a family right away, just taking that leap over to Canada, leaving her worried family. It would be really filling in and interesting to hear Biene’s respond to your concerns. Can’t wait for her voice to your loving letters. Have a wonderful weekend with your dear Biene.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      I agree, dear Cornelia, it appears a bit harsh to have dwelt on this topic to such a detail, especially as Biene had a lot of problems to deal with at home. Yet, it was in response to Biene’s letter, in which she brought up the topic of birth control. Next week you will be reading her response. Have a wonderful weekend! Peter

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Des

    So many good points in your letter that it’s impossible to address them all. One of them is pointing out the need to “foster illusions with your parents to alleviate the pain of the final farewell”. It’s so great that you have documentation of this conversation. I can totally relate to this from my own experiences with my own mother when I moved away from our hometown as a young man. I don’t know about Biene’s family, but parents sometimes have a way of making it all about them. I agree with Dr. Cardinal that in some cases, the “illusion” is necessary to keep the parent(s) from emotional collapse! I might assume he knew this from personal experience? Totally enjoyed your post, as always. Des.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Dear Des,
      You zeroed in on the one issue with which I had experienced a lot of inner turmoil at that particular time and quite a few years afterwards. To foster illusions, to conceal actual intentions, to twist the truth ever so little were abhorrent concepts in my idealized world. It is safe to say I was a bit of a fanatic about truthfulness. But now looking back, I realize that we do this all the time not for evil purposes but out of love for our fellow human beings. It sounds odd, but I believe that truthfulness in its extreme form is cruelty. I do not know whether I made myself clear. Entire posts could be written about this topic. Thank you very much, Des, for sharing your thoughts and feelings. Have a great weekend!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Des

        Nope, I totally get it, Peter, and I agree, blunt truth just isn’t always helpful. Good to know; I’ve struggled with that same issue many times. I am having a great weekend, Peter, hope you are as well!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Edda

    Peter, ich kann mich so gut in das alles hineinversetzen! Am Anfang einer Beziehung gibt es so viele Probleme und Vorstellungen und Fragen und und und..Daß Du Deinen Professor ins Vertrauen ziehen konntest, war wirklich sehr schön..Und daß Du auch schon eine kleine Wohnung fur Euch gefunden hattest, war ein Glück, oder? Ich kann mich auch noch an alles erinnern , was Dieter und mir als junges Paar damals sehr,sehr wichtig war.Alles sollte möglichst vorausschauend geklärt und geplant werden. Und viele Dinge sollten genau so laufen, wie wir es uns zusammen ausgedacht hatten.
    Und bei Euch kam nun noch erschwerend die große Entfernung dazu. Ihr hattet es schwer. Und trotzdem habt Ihr Euer Leben zusammen gestaltet, nachdem Ihr endlich zusammenkommen konntet…Bis dahin habt Ihr so viel überwunden, woran heute so manche Beziehung scheitern würde,denke ich!
    Mal sehen,was Biene antworten wird..
    Herzliche Grüße von uns!!!
    Edda

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Liebe Edda, mein Professor war der einzige in dieser schwierigen Zeit, dem ich mich mit meinen Sorgen anvertrauen konnte. Es tat mir gut, mich mal richtig aussprechen zu können und jemand zu haben, der eine echte Hilfe war. Dr. Cardinal war sogar bereit, bei einem Deutschlandbesuch Bienes Eltern zu besuchen quasi als eine Art Friedensmission. Doch dazu ist es nicht gekommen. Ich schreibe das nur, um zu betonen, wie er mir damals geholfen hat.
      Herzliche Grüße auch an Dieter! Peter

      Like

  6. Ann Coleman

    How fortunate you were to have a professor you could turn to for advice! Whatever you ultimately decided, I think it was wise of you to seek his opinion, and then to think about whether or not you agreed. For all that you and Biene have been through, you deserved a long and happy marriage!

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Tiny

    Great you had a good mentor. I much liked how he put it back then. And I look forward to hearing about your life in the “doll house” or wherever you two ended up…love this love story 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Book I of the P and G Klopp Story will end with Biene’s arrival in Canada. After that I will take a break from it. No worry, if you stick around long enough, you will find out more about us in the ‘doll house’. Haha! Good night!

      Like

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

DeepAsThoughts

My Mind Space

Susan Rushton

Celebrating gardens, nature, photography and a creative life

Backyard Photographer

Spark creativity by capturing the world around you one photo at a time

PETER GRAARUP WESTERGAARD

Independent blog about literature, philosophy and society in words and images

The Hejhej blog

Another blog that you dont need

The Flowers of Art

In the kingdom of life, with the strokes of the brush, the bow and the pen, artists have sowed their hearts to contrive, fields rivalling in beauty the Garden of Eden.

The Timeless Treasure

A Sneak Peek of My Life !!!

Theresa J. Barker

science fiction writer

Jupp Kappius

Zur Erinnerung an Josef "Jupp" Kappius

Calmgrove

Exploring the world of ideas through books

Sophie und ihre Welt

Bücher - Zitate - Musik - Literatur - Philosophie - Worte - Ohrensessel-Gedanken - Momentaufnahmen - Bilder - Fotos - Werken

A Walk to Stressfree Life

be thankful for this blessed life!!!

Karolina Górska & Piotr Jurkiewicz

fotografia z naszej perspektywy

JAMILA DWORKIN

BLOG / CHARACTER STUDIES / SHORT STORIES

Melissa Blue Fine Art

Celebrating the Healing Beauty of Nature

The Peter and Gertrud Klopp Family Project

Reflections on Life, Family and Community

a little bit of Ingrid

the little things, the little moments...they aren't little!

MaritimeMac

Go Explore

Inspire me

Love, Relationship, Lifestyle, Purpose, Marriage & Family

Travelling around the world

Traveller, photography

Intrepid Venture

Exploring the realms of the arts, sciences and politics

sandsoftime10

A peek into Megha's mind

natureliteratureculturejournal

This is a journal about the things that inspire me: a beautiful landscape, a good book, a fascinating museum.

Candid Chicana

Chicano Culture, Self-Development & More

Frank Solanki

If you want to be a hero well just follow me

Plants and Beyond

Green Plants Based Living and Gardening

Zimmerbitch

age is just a (biggish) number

Thinking Ahead

I like a lot of things about life. I write about some of them.

witlessdatingafterfifty

Relationships reveal our hearts.

Wondering and Wandering

"How vain it is to sit down to write when you have not stood up to live! Methinks that the moment my legs begin to move my thoughts begin to flow..." --Henry David Thoreau, August 19, 1851

Frau Stich-Schlinge

handGemachtes & allerlei Tüddellütt

Stella, oh, Stella

Garten - Reisen - Lesen - Musik - Handarbeiten - Motorbike - Wandern ...

My Fragmented Narrative

rants and ramblings freshly served

rabbitpatchdiarycom

comfort and joy from my home to yours

mommermom

......one moms journey

Find Your Middle Ground

"Life is a series of highs and lows. Be grateful for the highs. Be graceful in the lows. Enjoy life fully and find contentment in your Middle Ground" Val Boyko

This Much I Know

exploring life now that our small people have all grown up

the creative life in between

cherishing the moments and exploring my passion for creativity... through art, photography, food, and writing

Retirementally Challenged

Navigating through my post-work world

Curious Steph

explorations on the journey of living

The Cedar Journal

The adventures of a cedar canoe

%d bloggers like this: