The Peter and Gertrud Klopp Family Project

Reflections on Life, Family and Community

Chapter 37 of the Peter and Gertrud Klopp Story – Part III

32

116Mountain

Biene’s Urgent Plea for Understanding

January 11th 1966, Velbert

My dear Love, I am a bit exhausted and my nerves are on edge. But don’t be afraid. I never lose my confidence and courage, whatever happens. Nothing can prevent me from coming to you.

First I must tell you this. The letter from the Canadian Embassy arrived today! I filled out the form at once and it is now on its way back to Cologne. But Peter, I had to do something you may not understand. But I had to do it to take a burden off my mother’s heart. I have asked the ambassador whether it will be possible to grant me a visa and a work permit for one year, before I will come to you forever. I have arranged with my mother to go to you till Christmas and then come back home to make the final decision. It breaks my mother’s heart. She cannot bear the thought that already this step I am going to do might be the final one. She must get acquainted to this thought by and by. Peter, please understand I have to grant her this favour. I must try everything to leave her at least in the hope that I am not bound to stay with you if I should not be able to stand the new life.

Peter, once together with you, I can reassure her in everything and she will get acquainted to the thought that I will stay with you. Peter, believe me, I only want to do the best and therefore never let doubts enter your heart! I need courage and I only can get it through you, when I know you are not troubled. Look, Peter, I come to you, I think, in April by airplane taking only small luggage with me. Coming back after Christmas I will take everything with me, for then I will stay forever. Peter, understand this change of plans, if the embassy should grant me my wish.

To be continued

32 thoughts on “Chapter 37 of the Peter and Gertrud Klopp Story – Part III

  1. Amy

    Well, she sure sounds genuine to me. I can’t wait to read about your reaction. I hope she allayed your fears and that you accepted this short-term compromise with understanding.

    What a love story! You really should write a book.

    Liked by 3 people

  2. taphian

    Eure Geschichte erinnert mich an ein Lied “über sieben Brücken mußt Du gehen….”. Es war ja wirklich eine unheimlich schwierige Beziehung, die man sich heute – beim besten Willen – nicht mehr vorstellen kann. Gerade, da mein Sohn schon so oft im Ausland war und ist (Amerika, Canada, Japan, Österreich etc.), kann ich Biene’s Eltern überhaupt nicht verstehen. Man muss den Kindern die Freiheit geben, dann kommen sie auch immer gerne zurück. Bin gespannt, wie es weitergeht. Du machst es ja wirklich sehr spannend.
    Liebe Grüße aus Hamburg, Mitza

    Liked by 4 people

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Genau das, was du über Bienes Eltern geschrieben hast, hat meine Mutter immer gesagt. Vier ihrer Kinder sind ausgewandert, doch has sie uns nie verloren und hat uns fast jedes zweite Jahr besucht und an unserem Familienleben teilgenommen. Liebe Grüße aus Kanada!

      Liked by 3 people

  3. karfunkelfee

    …hard to read with a sense of endless missing, with this feel of another long one year- time of waiting for her. And on the other side – I can also understand her decision. Endlessly whole life will change and in a kind of way parents will not lose her daughter out of sight – but out of reach. Such a difficult decision and also for her with also a lot of missing. A great love story. Dear greetings to you and a nice week-end!

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      You are so right, dear Karfunkelfee! These were difficult times for both of us. As you will see in the second part of her letter in the next post, Biene was exposed to endless pressures from her family and friends. It is truly a miracle of love that Biene and I eventually got together again and got married in Canada. You too, have a great weekend!

      Liked by 3 people

      1. Stella, oh, Stella

        When I read this, I get the feeling that Biene’s family and friends went into a kind of collective hysteria. I mean, even at that time one was not completely out of the world in Canada.
        It must also have been disappointing to Biene that nobody supported her or accepted her choice.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Peter Klopp Post author

        For Biene’s father Canada was a country where ‘fox and rabbit say good night to another’, to use a German expression. Yes, it was a great disappointment for Biene that she had no support from family and friends.

        Liked by 1 person

  4. Des

    Peter, It’s interesting to me as I become aware that you and Biene come from different cultures and backgrounds than my wife and I, and also, a slightly different space in time. Nevertheless, I do appreciate your respect for tradition, and the honor and integrity you both displayed throughout your relationship leading up to your marriage. I find both her and your concern for her family and their feelings very admirable. Always really happy to see yet another installment of your great story!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      I am glad you like the story. I write it primarily for the family so they will have a record of their roots. Thank you, Des, for the insightful comment showing how much we share and have in common!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Nurul Fitri Lubis

    Through this letter, I got the impression that Biene was still not sure to move to Canada for good. Or probably she wanted /convinced her mom to see whether she could cope well with you in the foreign country. I can’t wait to know the answer in the next posts. Beautiful love story, Peter.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Ann Coleman

    This is one of those cases where I can see both sides. You wanted Biene with you for good because you loved her so much, and she wanted to be with you as well. But she also couldn’t stand to break her mother’s heart. I imagine she was so conflicted! If only her mother would trust her to know what was right, but I guess she just couldn’t.
    By the way, you write about all this so well! It really does hold the reader’s interest, even knowing that the two of you eventually married and spent your lives together. That’s not easy to do!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Thank you, Ann, for this lovely comment so full of insight in the most difficult phase in our love story! I read your comment to my wife and she liked as much as I did. Happy Mother’s Day!

      Liked by 1 person

  7. kopfundgestalt

    Eine Sache bewegt mich: Welche Schuld hätte Bienes Mutter auf sich geladen, wenn durch ihre immensen Zweifel eure Partnerschaft zerbrochen wäre. Shame on her..man muss auch eine Tochter ziehen lassen. Man besitzt sie nicht. Genau das hätte sie sich vor Augen halten müssen…und wenn eure Partnerschaft zerbrochen wäre in Kanada hätte sie ihre Tochter immer noch auffangen können!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. corneliaweberphotography

    Biene appears to be a woman of compromise and that’s a gift to her. I don’t believe that she had doubts of her future reuniting with you, because she seems to be madly in love with you. And I do understand her decision, keeping peace with her unsupporting family, yet it also would be her a taste of the country and the man she decided to be for the rest of her live. Peter, du spannst uns aber wirklich immer wieder auf die Folter!! I don’t know quite how to translate this one.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Many thanks, Cornelia, for your comment so full of appreciation and understanding! Some German expressions are hard to translate The closest translation I can come up with is: you keep us on tenterhooks. Have a great Sunday, Cornelia!

      Like

  9. Edda

    Unglaublich, Eure Story ist ja ein wahres “Wechselbad der Gefühle” , Peter!
    Biene hat wirklich versucht, allen so wenig weh zu tun, wie es nur ging. Für jeden hat sie sich das “ausgesucht”, was ihrer Meinung nach am besten zu ertragen war.. Ihre Eltern haben es ihr nicht leicht gemacht, im Gegenteil…
    Aber es tut eben weh, sein Kind in eine ungewisse Zukunft zu entlassen.
    Und da Bienes Eltern eben so große Angst um sie hatten, konnten sie es ihrer Tochter so nur schwerer machen..
    Da hat Biene meiner Meinung nach sehr viel Geduld und Tochterliebe gezeigt und gleichzeitig aber auch an Dein Verständnis appelliert.Ob zu dieser Zeit einer bemerkt hat, wie Biene sich gequält haben muß? Ich finde jedenfalls, sie hat schon damals ihr großes, liebevolles Herz gezeigt, das sage ich jetzt hier einfach mal so ohne Pathos..
    Auf Deine Antwort bin ich sehr gespannt!
    Ganz herzliche Grüße!
    Edda

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Liebe Edda, bevor ich meine Antwort veröffentliche, kommt noch der zweite Teil von Bienes Brief. So musst du dich noch ein Weilchen gedulden.
      Auch dürfen wir in unserer Kritik der Eltern nicht vergessen, dass sie mich nie vor der Hochzeit kennengelernt haben, so dass in ihren Augen ich ein völlig fremder Mann war, der im Begriff war, ihre Tochter ins ferne Kanada zu entführen. So habe ich heute ein viel besseres Verständnis für ihre Opposition als damals als ich in den Veränderungen unserer Pläne eine große Gefahr für unsere Zukunft in Kanada erblickte.
      Wie immer habe ich mich sehr über deinen lieben Kommentar gefreut und danke dir ganz herzlich.

      Like

      1. Edda

        Genau, Peter! Heute sehe ich das auch so, deshalb meinte ich ja, daß Bienes Eltern so große Angst hatten, ihre Tochter loszulassen, waren genau diese von Dir angeführten Gründe.
        Daß Biene so verständnisvoll reagiert hat, spricht für sie !
        In diesem Alter hätte ich viel mehr den Trotzkopf rausgekehrt und meine Eltern meinen Unwillen spüren lassen..🙈Das war mehr so mein Charakter…
        .

        Like

  10. Dina

    Oh dear, Biene was indeed exposed to much pressure from her family and friends, Peter. It must have been very, very hard for you all. As Cornelia wrote, Biene appears to be a woman of compromise and trying to make it easy for everybody by giving in.
    I left my home country to get married in a foreign country when I was 23 and reading your story I feel grateful for the support of my family and friends back home. But then again, everybody knew and adored the man in my case and Germany isn’t that far away from Norway.
    I’m very much looking forward to the second part of the letter, Peter!
    Hope you had a good start to the new week!
    Best regards from Cley. x
    P.S.
    Have you managed to gain a little more weight?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      Dear friends, my apologies go out to you for not responding earlier. What a wonderful comment you wrote with so much understanding and compassion. Dina had experienced a more supportive reaction from friends and family when she followed the man of her love to Germany.
      In the meantime you read the second part of Biene’s letter and I am sure that your admiration for her courage and love has increased even some more.
      I am happy to report that I am gaining some weight and slowly feel my strength coming back. Last Sunday I took Biene across the lake in our canoe. It felt good to be able to do this again.
      Greetings and lots of love from the Klopps in Canada!

      Like

  11. Bun Karyudo

    I’m not sure how your younger self received Biene’s plan. I can imagine you might have had grave doubts about it. I’ll have to wait for that part of the story. From my point of view, it seems a very fair compromise. Biene wanted to spend her life with you, but she also wanted to allay the dread felt by her mother. I believe I’m right in saying that poor woman had by this point still not even met you! How could her imagination help but supply all manner of terrifying scenarios about life in a distant and mysterious land? Biene’s insistence on coming to be with you in Canada despite her family’s misgivings already seems admirably brave.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Peter Klopp Post author

      For Biene’s mother it was indeed a terrifying aspect to see her daughter leave and go to this ‘distant and mysterious land’. For her father Germany was still the centre of his universe and Canada was truly the end of the world. For Biene and me Canada was and still is the reality of our dreams come true.

      Liked by 1 person

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